Pegasus Black

Before I start this rap text, I just wanna thank everyone for being so patient, and bearing with me over the past few months, while I figure this shit out.

Let’s go.

Is anybody out there ?
It feels like I’m talking to myself
No one seems to know my struggle,
And everything I come from
Can anybody hear me,
I guess I keep talking to myself
Feels like I’m going insane,
Am I the one who’s crazy ?

So why in the world do I feel so alone ?
Nobody but me, I’m on my own
Is there anyone out there, who feels the way I feel ?
That there is and let me know
So I know that I’m not the only one !

I went away, I guess that opened up some lanes
But there was no one who even knew I was going through growing pains
Hatred was flowing through my veins,
On the verge of going insane
I wanted almost killing this guy
It’s like I was jealous of him,
'cause of the attention he was getting
I felt horrible about myself,
He was cool and loved and I wasn’t
Anyone who was buzzing back then could of got it
Almost went at his faggot friend to,
God! It feels like I’m going psychotic
Thank God that I didn’t do it
I’d of had my ass handed to me,
And I knew it
But Kestrel wasn’t there anymore to seen me through it
I’m in the booth popping another pill,
Trying talk myself into it,
« Are you stupid? You gonna start attacking people for no reason?!
Especially when you can’t even prove that they hurted you
You’re lying to yourself, you’re slowing dying
You’re denying, your health is declining with your self esteem
you’re crying out for help »

« Zak, you’re no longer the man »,
That’s a bitter pill to swallow!
All I know is I’m wallowing,
Self-loathing and hollow
Bottoms up on the pill bottle,
Maybe I hit my bottom tomorrow
My sorrow echos in this hall though
But I must be talking to the wall though,
I don’t see nobody else
But « all these other php-coder suck », is all that I know
I’ve turned into a hater, I put up a false mavado
But Zak is not an egomaniac, that’s not his motto

So I picked myself up off the ground,
And fucking swam before I drowned
Hit my bottom so hard I bounced twice,
Advice this time around
It’s different, them last 3 last months didn’t count
On february I was on drugs,
On march I was flushing ‘em out
On april I rediscovered a beautiful new world
I’ve come to make it up to you,
Now no more fucking around
I got something to prove to those who I love,
Cause I feel like I let ‘em down
So please accept my apology,
I finally feel like I’m back to normal
I feel like me again, let me formally re-introduce myself
To you for those of you who don’t know
The new me’s back to the old me,
And homie I don’t show no signs of slowing or bowing,
I’m blowing up all over
My life is no longer a movie,
But the show ain’t over homos
I’m back with a vengeance homie,
White keep your head up
Baba keep your head up,
All the others keep your heads up
Don’t let up, just keep slaying em
Rest in peace to Zak, my new name is Pegasus,
Cause I know what this shit is like
I struggle with this shit every single day and I’m

____

So there it is, damn, feels like i just woke up or something
Guess I just forgot who the fuck I was, man
And to anybody I thought about going at,
It was never nothing personal
Just some shit that I was going through
And to the rest of you, I’m back!